My deal to all my fans.
Also, my announcement
01/13/2007
I want to make a deal with you. Please read all of this.
I have learned some really crazy stuff. Even though it is letting you
know some personal stuff about me, I feel its worth sharing.
Last night I saw a movie for the second time which has been changing my
life. It is called "The Secret."
It is an insanely powerful true movie about how much you can do with
yourself as a human and how once you accept that concept immediately
your life will start changing for the better. It shows you how
literally every second of every day, we have decisions in our lives to
make and can completely mold an insane future for ourselves.
After a major college tour in 2004 forced me into exhaustion a couple
of
years ago, I was too tired to walk on stage. This started an association of anxiety and fear to performing. (Which was really weird
because I had been performing since I was 12.)
I decided that I had 3 options to get out of it.
1. I could quit stand up
2. Do a drug before I go up on high pressure sets.
3. Learn from reading and listening to tapes on how we think, how the
mind works, and then not only getting out of my anxiety, but re-loving
my job and also sharing with the world what I learned.
I chose 3. I started listening to tapes about how we have complete
control of what we think about and don't know it. Basic thoughts that
are so obvious, but when heard from a profesional, make so much more
sense.
Before I started this crusade in 2004, my problem was this.......
I would go up on stage and worry about things I didn't want. I would go
up and think, and I know this sounds crazy, "I wonder if you think
about
it enough, if you can make yourself faint." I know this sounds nuts.
But
there are people who worry before they go on planes, and there are
people who worry before they walk into elavators, which is also
completely thinking the worst situation before you do something over
and
over, and then literally linking up your nervous system up to that
event
to a point where just thinking about that thing makes you stressed.
Then I learned with a ton of training something so obvious. If we
worry,
we are putting into our minds what we dont want to have happen. I was
actually thinking, I hope I don't faint. Which at the height of this
worrying I got a call that I booked my first comedy central appearance
in 2004 on a show called "premium blend".
Well before I learned everything, and got that call, my immediate
thought was "what if I faint on premium blend?"
Well I spent 3 months before the set trying to focus on "not thinking
about fainting" on premium blend. Which now I know is insane.
You can't occupy your mind with what you don't want. It will win.
This is crazy to admit, but I will to show you what happened. If you
watch my premium blend (which is on also on the "one dimple" dvd disc if
you
have it, you will see that I am holding the mic too much. I pulled the
set off, but I am completely in fear inside and because I kept thinking "don't faint" I was standing like I would fall at any second. I wasnt myself. I didn't have the confidence that I had in the past.
Even though that happened I still got my half hour special from that performance.
When I found out I got my special I decided to completely change
everything. I didn't want to do a half hour special the same fearful
way. So instead of thinking don't faint, I thought for one hour a day"you are going to have the best set ever", "I am going to rock it so
hard."
I will be the best special ever. You will get a standing o for a long
time" it will bring you so many great fans" well, as I kept occupying
my
mind with those thoughts (it was kind of like taking your mind to the
gym) the fear completely left. I didn't think about it, because we can
only think of one thing at a time and I chose to focus on doing great.
My special went amazingly well and was the most played of 2006.
This learning has changed everything for me. I now feel like I have a
way deeper foundation for this and have a way deeper appreciation for
the people who write me and tell me they love my work and am feeling
even more invincible on stage, in health, and in life. This is why I
love to hang out after every show and meet everyone. It's why I live on
myspace. I am loving performing way more then before I even had the
anxiety in the first place, making the anxiety the best thing that ever
happened to me. Remember that it isn't the bad event that hurts you.
Its
how you react to it.
So all of this has made me want to communicte with this to you. I am
now
learning that what you truly envision becomes real. I have for 2007
some really huge goals and I would like to request your help on it. And
I will help you too.
I am in the top 100 on comedy centrals stand up show down thing. This
is
a true honor. Everyone else in this is fantastic and it really is fun
to
be in the top with them. They are now having voting to be in the top
20.
Because of what I learned in "The Secret" and other teachings I changed
my thoughts from "can I get in the top 20?" to "how can I get in the
top
20." Making it a given that I will. I actually am envisioning that I
will be number one.
So I am asking you guys to help me. I know that if you guys get behind
me and vote everyday, and tell your friends about me. I could easily get this and show
my
stuff to many new fans and get to do more and more of what I love.
The stuff I learned tought me to take the actions to make these things
happen, such as writing this, to show you guys that it is possible.
I am on tour right now. About to do clubs in indianapolis, chicago, and
dayton, alone in hotels with my computer.
In return for your help, I will promise you that I will return every
email personally (just me writing you back), and I will write 2 new
blogs a week. Some funny, some motivational. Also show you and myself
how much is possible. I really look forward to doing this and everytime
I get a chance to do something in this industry, I am really thankful.
This is what I want to do and have wanted to do since I was 5. I can't
wait to see what happens.
Ohh by the way, here is an announcement.... Comedy Central has given me
a 1 hour long special, since the half hour went so well. It will be
taping in seattle at a theater in March. Guess how nuts that show will be!
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